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On the eve of the departure of the youth team of Ukraine to Cherkassy for the qualifying match of the European Championship (U-21) against their peers from Iceland, the coach of the "blue-yellow" team answered the questions of the correspondent of the newspaper "Komanda".

— Sergey Ivanovich, will the Ukrainian national team go to the next match against Iceland with the motto “nowhere to retreat”?

- For us, the quality of the game is very important, but we do not forget about the positive result, so we will do our best to bring these two components together.

- A lot of new-old players have been called up for the matches against Iceland and France. Are these organizational conclusions after the defeat by Macedonia?

- If you remember the work of our coaching staff, then there are changes at almost every stage of preparation. This means that we give a chance to each of the players to prove themselves. Now young people are trusted in clubs, so they have all the prerequisites for growth, speaking in the national team.

— Shakhtar striker Boryachuk was called up from the newcomers...

— Andriy is now scoring a lot as part of the Pitmen's youth team, so why not see him in action and in the national team jersey.

— Are there any losses?

- Burda was injured. And after consulting doctors, they decided that it was better for him to be treated at the club. Migunov and Khoblenko have been damaged, but they should be in service soon.

- Before the match with Macedonia, you said that your team lacked teamwork. How will you solve this problem now?

— A lot depends on the intellect of the players, therefore, communicating with the guys individually and during the training process, we try to convey to them all the subtleties of what our coaching staff wants to see, and also try to draw conclusions after the matches with Macedonia and Denmark.

— Iceland— the leader of our group. Is this a surprise?

For many fans, perhaps it is. But I want to say that this country has been running a state program for 20 years, according to which many football arenas have been built, there are Spanish and Dutch systems for training young players. And the result of all this high-quality work is that the national team of Iceland entered the European Championship, playing in a group with such monsters as Holland, the Czech Republic and Turkey.

The youth team of the last convocation reached the playoff matches of the European Championship. Yes, and the youth team (players born in 1995), which now represents the interests of the youth team, participated in the final part of the Euro in 2012. So we are in for an interesting and difficult match.

- Nevertheless, the style of play of the Icelanders, who are not called “Our Boys” in their homeland, is they great physical readiness and fighting on every part of the field?

- They use their strengths. This is power football, a lot of long passes, there are also elements of ball control. And still it is necessary to note their game discipline.

— In the matches against Iceland and France, how many points would you be satisfied with?

- Maximum amount. In general, we have an even group, and I'm sure that each of the rivals will lose points. How could anyone assume that the same Icelanders would stumble at home in the game with Northern Ireland? Therefore, it is too early to say in advance who is closer to entering the Euro. It is very important for our children to understand that everything depends only on us.

— The junior team will play all their home matches in Cherkassy. Why?

- The Ukrainian national team is the number one team in the country, and it is natural that we would like to play in any region where there would be a full stadium. In Cher-kassy all conditions are created for this. It's just that in some other cities there are no such conditions. And above all, this concerns the infrastructure of the host arenas. Although, I repeat, we are ready to play everywhere. Would three-buns be empty in Rovno, Khmelnitsky or Krivoy Rog? But not everything depends on our football federation...

Sergey Demyanchuk

Hi all! My name is Alexander, I am 25 years old, born and raised in St. Petersburg. I want to tell you my story about how I faced neurosis, panic attacks and agoraphobia, obsessive thoughts and hippochondria, and how I managed to successfully and almost completely get rid of these unpleasant and useless experiences.

Perhaps I’ll start by telling you a little about myself and my past, since the roots of all my mistakes in thinking, character and perception of the world around me and myself in particular grow from there:

I was born in a dysfunctional family, an alcoholic mother and a walking father, whom I never saw, a small room on the outskirts of the city. It was a gift of fate that at the age of 2 my unlucky mother was deprived of parental rights and my guardians took me to live in a two-room apartment - my current beloved mother and grandmother (God rest her soul), who passed away this spring at the age of 93 ...

As a child, I was spoiled, overprotected, until recently I lived with my mother in the same room, which also greatly affected my upbringing and character, I have always been very suspicious, anxious, overly cowardly, but at the same time a perfectionist and tried to control everything and all in your life. Like everyone else, I went to school, I studied perfectly well until the 6th grade, but then my grades began to drop rapidly due to my passion for sports, in which I immediately began to succeed and soon I was able to achieve good results, at the age of 17-18 I has already been a multiple champion and winner of the city and country championships.

enrolled in sports university for the day, but was expelled from the first year for poor progress. On the this moment I am in my final year of undergraduate education Faculty of Economics, where I entered, as they say, for the sake of a “crust” and in order not to upset my parents, and I still think that I should have chosen a humanitarian direction rather than studying the exact sciences and economics (at school, the Russian language, literature, history were much easier for me, but in mathematics, physics, etc., I could not enter)).

I work as a manager in a small company engaged in design and construction in the field of energy supply, which also does not bring me satisfaction at the moment and I do not see myself in this profession in the future.

In general, the lion's share of tension and worries in my life is caused by uncertainty and a desire to quickly find myself in this life, resistance to reality and a desire for change, despite the fact that I am very lazy and, due to my upbringing, I am not used to taking responsibility and making serious decisions on my own, I’m used to not to solve problems, but to put them on the back burner and avoid meeting them. In my personal life, I also have nothing definite, I am not married, I have no children and have never had a serious relationship ..

For the last 4 years, I periodically began to drive myself strongly with thoughts that I was seriously ill with something and other obsessive thoughts. At first, I was diagnosed with a hernia of the back, which was most likely an ordinary nervous strain and having gone on vacation in 2011, I forgot about it, but but almost immediately I started having problems with digestion, and due to my super suspiciousness and anxiety, I began to inflate this problem and wind up almost cancer of anything, even found almost blood in the stool (before that, our imagination and faith in certain things, even absurd ones, can deceive us and wishful thinking), and constant searches and comparison of symptoms on the Internet did their job - I found and appropriated everything that was at least a little like my guesses about the “terrible disease”

I already had symptoms (tachycardia, pressure) then - during the exacerbation of these nervous experiences about my sores, but then I had not yet reached the peak and these experiences did not cross the border and did not result in panic attacks and agoraphobia .. I just don’t I paid attention to them and was only concerned that I had only a few months left to live)))

At the end of 2014, at one of the regular weekend parties, I tried one, as they say, “light drug”. In general, to be honest, for the past few years I have not been shy about getting pretty drunk on weekends, which helped me become more confident in myself and forget about my problems for a while and feel more relaxed and sociable than I really was. But this time, everything was a little different ... A couple of days of unbridled fun under the influence of a drug and mixed alcohol, I was pretty beat up.

As usual, on Monday I went to work on a small retreat after all that I had drunk and mixed up. Sitting in the subway and driving one stop, I suddenly felt an unprecedented feeling until now wild fear and panic, the desire to escape from there as soon as possible, as if falling into some kind of hole. The people sitting opposite looked at me and did not understand what was happening to me. I blushed, began to cover my face with my hands, my heart was beating at a frantic speed and it seemed ready to jump out, it became difficult for me to breathe and it seemed that this was some kind of heart attack and I was about to die ...

Running out at the next stop, I left the subway and walked back home to a friend with whom we spent this crazy weekend. I then thought that this effect of the drug had not yet ended and decided to sit out with him and recover, I was afraid to go home in this form, I was afraid that my parents would see that something was wrong with me ... the next two days were just hell - I was afraid to go out on the street, I couldn’t fall asleep, I ate a whole bunch of sedatives and at night I already wanted to call an ambulance or go to droppers, I had to take a few days off at work ..

I felt sick, every 15-20 minutes I ran to the toilet for a little, digestion was disturbed, my nerves were like taut strings, and from every rustle I shuddered as if a bomb had exploded next to me.

A few days later, I more or less came to my senses and went to work, went home and, on the whole, moved a little away from the wild horror, believing that I had fully recovered from the disastrous party ... but it wasn’t there - the attack was repeated first at work under the boss (I had to say that there was something wrong with pressure) - then again in the subway - then at home lying in bed at night .. I didn’t understand what was happening to me, my hands were constantly shaking, throwing cold sweat on my nerves, my eyelids twitching, it seemed to me that I had lost my mind and my brain is permanently and permanently damaged from taking this ill-fated “soft drug.”

I started depersonalization and derealization, everything around me seemed somehow unreal, I could not keep my attention on something for a long time, I could not read or even watch TV, my body and muscles were constantly in tension, my neck ached, I was tormented by insomnia, I drank handfuls of valerian and other pressure pills ..

In the end, I remembered that I have a psychotherapist friend and decided to go to see him. After listening to me, he immediately diagnosed panic attacks, wrote me a couple of prescriptions for antidepressants and some other strong sedative, and said that everything would pass in a month. Having bought all these drugs, something stopped me from immediately starting taking antidepressants, most likely after reading reviews on the Internet that after their cancellation it becomes very bad, I was just afraid to start taking the course right away.

During the winter holidays, I planned to fly on vacation and I already had tickets on hand, but naturally, being in such a deplorable psychological state, and even from childhood, being terribly afraid of planes on the day of departure in agony, I handed over the tickets and, after a couple of hours of tantrums, called a taxi and left for the remaining holidays to the dacha in the Leningrad region ... so I launched the avoidance mechanism ...

After spending a week in the country in depression and a terrible state, I climbed the Internet from morning to evening and looked for ways to get rid of this ailment with the terrible name “panic attacks”, talked on forums, from where my “sick” brain picked up more and more new symptoms and avoidance and began to appropriate them for myself ... one evening, as always, while reading information on the Internet about VVD and panic attacks, I came across Pavel Fedorenko's website, where I had the opportunity to download a free book-guide to getting rid of all my problems.

Literally in a couple of hours, having “swallowed” this book, for some reason I immediately believed everything that was written there and decided to act in this direction. Somehow, after going to work after the holidays, I began to try not to avoid avoidance and follow the advice that I read in the book “ Happy life without VVD and panic attacks, but of course, at first, without understanding the essence of my problem, I didn’t succeed, but that was the beginning of my journey back to normal life without panic, because there is no result without trial and error ..

At that time, I had already begun to avoid a lot of things and narrowed my life down to a tiny “comfort zone” in which, as it seemed to me, a panic attack would not get me: I completely excluded alcohol, coffee, even quit smoking for a while, but quickly returned to this addiction after visiting a cardiologist, who said that “at least I can go into space”)) Later, I also took tests and did ultrasound of almost all organs, which also did not reveal any pathologies and made me understand that all problems and symptoms are only in my head. I stopped talking to my friends, avoided work meetings with my boss, and just business negotiations, often avoided traveling in transport, cinemas and places where he could not quickly leave in the event of an attack ..

Studying the book and video recordings of Pavel Fedorenko, I gradually began to understand what was happening to me and the level of anxiety subsided a little from around the clock, but I still made many mistakes and only occasionally left the “comfort zone” I had created. At the end of March, I decided to sign up for Pashin's training called "Healthy Thinking System". At first, information and practices were hard for me, because at that moment I was still looking for a “magic pill” and dreamed of getting rid of the symptoms of VVD and panic as soon as possible, and the brain resisted adequately perceiving information.

Over time, I got better and better, I began to understand and realize that panic attacks did not arise on their own, I began to understand what led to them and that the root of the problem is really in my thinking, habits and established stereotypes and behavior in life, I began Practice the practices given in class.

At the moment, I feel almost completely free. I stopped avoiding coffee, alcohol (although now much less often and not in such quantities as before)), I go to work and chat with friends, go to the cinema and ride public transport, I started going to the gym and swimming pool, I go to the bathhouse once a week, I didn’t take antidepressants and just threw them away along with prescriptions a couple of months ago, I attend exhibitions, go out of town and, in principle, I don’t have strong restrictions anymore, except that I didn’t go to other cities after my “illness” either on a plane or the train has not yet landed, but I am sure that this is all ahead of me, I try not to rush things and accept both my successes and small setbacks and life's difficulties.

It is very important to understand and realize that we all fell into neurosis and the psychological disorders resulting from it did not immediately, our lifestyle and perception of the world around us led us to this dead end, and at the level of thinking that we had before panic attacks, the problem cannot be solved, panic attacks are just the tip of the iceberg, the signal of the body that we have already gone too far and it’s time to change something in our lives, and that part of the iceberg that is “under water”, which is invisible to us, is precisely our maladaptive behavior, our wrong reactions to certain events, infantilism, irresponsibility, inability to cope with emotions that sometimes bring our nervous system out of action for several hours or even days, a lot of obligations to yourself and the world around you, generally inadequate thinking ... you can go in for sports and remove symptoms but still experience anxiety, you can meditate and try to find spiritual harmony, but still feel discomfort in uncomfortable situations and exciting moments.

In conclusion, I want to say that after a few months I continue to work on myself, I returned to my usual calm state and little, and probably already almost impossible to return me to the chaos in my head that I had in the winter, but looking from the outside, and also with the help of the community in which I am, I understand that I still have to make many new discoveries in myself and overcome myself in many ways before I can become a truly happy person.

I wish everyone who is faced with such a problem as VVD and panic attacks patience and faith in themselves, not to make mistakes in getting rid of them, and a deep awareness of the fact that all anxieties and fears are just thoughts, and only we ourselves have them we create and then blindly believe in them, losing the most valuable thing we have in life - the present moment and real life, let's learn to live in the present and not in thoughts about the past and worries about the future ... all the best)

* Note: spelling, punctuation and style of the author preserved.

“Because every circumstance
it is a gift and there is a treasure in every experience.”
Neil Donald Walsh

How well you live your life, in what direction, negative or positive, depends on you.

Skill plays an important role in this. accept any circumstance: and unpleasant situations, and painful conditions, and social conflicts.

In order to gain the skill of "acceptance", we suggest understanding what it is and how you can learn to accept.

What is acceptance

Acceptance is new level of understanding.

This is the understanding that everything that happened to you, for some reason you need it.

Understanding that the problem always comes from within you outward, and is manifested from within by external circumstances. You receive what you broadcast to the World.

The Outside World is signaling you, through the situation, to which pay attention to yourself.

Understanding that accepting the situation does not mean accept injustice what is happening about you does not mean submitting to circumstances.

Accept this:

• Agree that the situation has already been created and that we need to move on based on the presence of this fact.
• Agree that it is impossible to change events, but you can understand them differently.
• Find the reason why this situation has arisen in your life, and understand how to act so this doesn't happen to you.

What is important to learn to accept

#1 Accept yourself

It is difficult for a person to accept himself when he dissatisfied with himself.

To accept yourself means to accept all your strengths and weaknesses. agree that human being imperfect.

Recognize that you you have the right to make mistakes that you don't have to be perfect in everything.

And that you don't have to live up to others' expectations of you, no need to please.

#2 Accept other people

It's hard to accept others if you don't understand that the people who hurt you (from your point of view) are really are not a source pain.

Through such people, circumstances show you what you need to pay attention to in yourself.

You will not be able to accept the situation with one person, you will blame him, a similar situation will arise with others.

Because the world will signal to you “pay attention to the source in Yourself”, until you realize the essence of the problem itself.

When you accept the people around you, you realize that people are unfair in relation to others.

At the same time, you do not evaluate the actions of people and do not condemn them. Do you understand that people cannot match your expectations.

Acceptance of another person can be compared to maternal acceptance. Mother easily accepts pranks and any actions of a small unreasonable child.

Acceptance is the ability to understand that a person will NEVER change.

#3 Accept the situation (circumstances)

To accept circumstances means to agree that there are things in this life that do not correspond to your vision and perception of the World. What everything has its place.

Both what you perceive positively and what you perceive negatively.

Since the concepts of “positive” and “negative” are relative. As well as the concepts of “good and bad”, “difficult and easy”, “a pleasant person and an unpleasant one”.

All these qualities are endowed when the assessment is given. And it is not at all necessary that what you like will please others.

Or what is unpleasant for you, it is likely that others will delight. Because the criteria for evaluation and perception are different for everyone.

For example the weather. After all, there are days when she is not pleasant to you. But you accept This fact and don't try to change the weather.

And the fact that, for example, you do not like rain, does not mean that this natural phenomenon is not loved by all other people. There will always be people who love the rain.

Why is it important to learn acceptance?

By not accepting, the person thereby spends a lot of energy, energy and time resisting circumstances.

If a person cannot accept the circumstances, he constantly replays what happened in his thoughts, and worries every time on this occasion.

By doing so, a person only destroys itself both emotionally and physically.

It is also important to understand that in your life there will be no less unpleasant situations and disappointments, but having learned to accept, you will thereby begin to act not to your detriment.

First of all, the ability to accept you personally need, and not to participants in events that are unpleasant for you.

It does not matter what events occur in the outside world, it is important how you react to these events.

Rejection can be compared to a poisonous drink that you yourself drink but expect harm to be done to the “bad” person.

That is, to accept, this is first of all take care of yourself.

By learning to accept, a person becomes a more harmonious personality. It becomes stronger, calmer, more balanced, free from dogmas and opinions.

Such a person difficult to manipulate.

How to learn to accept

Step 1. Agree "Yes, it happened"

Do not confuse this point with humility.

To accept means to accept that the situation is inevitable, that you are ready to drag the hardships of adversity for the rest of your life. put up with it submit to circumstances.

And to accept the situation means to accept that it has already happened, but at the same time to understand that there is always a way from any situation, and from this one too. And as a rule, there is more than one way out.

It remains only to find this way out.

Step 2. Find the reason "why it happened"

Each situation contains "pearl of wisdom".

Think about why this situation happened to you. Realize what's important she highlights you.

Thank all the participants in the events, do not forget about yourself, for a new vision of what happened.

Step 3. Move on without looking back

For example: you left the house, and it is raining outside. You had to go back for an umbrella. You will not be offended and complain about the rain, that it is inopportune for you.

Even if you grumble, you certainly won’t hang in this state for a long time.

Take it as a fact and based on this position another time, before leaving, look out the window and grab necessary items right away so you don't have to go back.

3 techniques to adopt

Technique #1 Inhale Acceptance

We offer you a very simple practice to accept anything and everything.

It is called the Breath of Acceptance and is performed in the morning as soon as you wake up.

• Come to the window, greet the new day and declare your readiness accept any events in your life that will happen to you today.
• Ask the Higher Powers to help you and guide you in difficult times.
• Express intent see depth and wisdom in every step, in every circumstance of the coming day.
• Take a deep breath, joyfully accepting all the gifts of this day!

#2 Self Acceptance Affirmations

Do you want to increase self-acceptance and trust in the world in life by doing everything 5 minutes a day?

Affirmations for the chakras will help you. These are simple, and at the same time, unique practices that will allow you to "pump" important personal qualities easily and quickly.

Technique #3 Quit Everything

At one of the webinars for clients of the Mastery Keys Training Center, Alena suggested the following practice:

“There is one gesture that breaks out from most people in difficult times.

When you raise your hand up and in your hearts say "Fuck it ..."

We are cultured people, so we will call this gesture "Give up everything with your hand."

It means that you pass the decision this situation TOP, for example, to your higher self, your mentors, your spiritual teachers.

Instead of poking through closed doors, enter a semi-meditative state, raise your hand and sharply lower it down.

Thus you abdicate responsibility for all the grips of the 3D world and pass it on to higher powers for highest resolution situation and the highest good."

Many wrote after the webinar that the gesture worked in difficult situation. Experiment and you.

And don't forget to keep in focus what is really important to you.

To prove injustice towards you or take care of Yourself?

Fear is natural ordinary person. But in anticipation of trouble, the worst-case scenario “spins” in your brain, forcing you to act as if it is already a fait accompli. Expectation of failures, fear of them, can become the biggest obstacles on the way to Success.

Success lies on the other side of failure

Let's first look at our fears in terms of the nature of the universe. Remember: everything in this world is energy with a certain frequency of vibrations. For example, our eyes perceive light - electromagnetic vibrations of a certain spectrum. By analyzing the information that our organs of vision perceive before it enters our brain, we can make sure that these vibrations do not carry any evil or hostility, they are just vibrations.

But when we perceive them in our brain, we say, "I see a problem." In other words, we perceive high-frequency energies that do not carry any problems in themselves in such a way that they turn into a problem for us. Only by labeling yourself and others, you create favorable conditions for the emergence of problems and fears. And then "The mind experiences, and the brain remembers," as Wilder Penfield writes in his book "The Riddle of the Mind." And further. It is important to understand that there is neither stress nor happiness in everything that happens. A person of his own choice endows events, situations or objects with their content. “Facts do not exist, there are only interpretations of facts,” Nietzsche once said. In philosophical terms, a person is a subject that makes interpretations, and these interpretations will always be connected with his inner world.

Very often we feel disappointed about what then turned out to be in our favor. Know that there is always a benefit, even in failures. It's a paradox, but in your failures there is also a prize hidden - the opportunity to gain experience, grow wiser and become an expert in your life. “Nothing real can be threatening, nothing unreal exists. This is the peace of God,” says the book A Course in Miracles.

Stephen Pavlina writes:“When you hear someone tell you that success is easy, run away from him, because they will try to sell you another get-rich-quick idea. The honest truth is that it is very difficult - almost impossible - to succeed in something that you have not done before. But it's great. Understand that failure and success are not opposites. Failure is an inevitable part of success. When you fail, it means you take action, so you make mistakes and educate yourself. Success comes naturally once you finally know how to do the right thing."

“Man is not disturbed by events, but by his view of these events,” said the Stoic philosopher Epictetus 2,000 years ago. Sometimes even an accident can serve as an awakening to the beginning of a new life, and months spent in the hospital can be an invaluable gift of finding a “real life”, because “difficulties create opportunities.”

Your philosophy should be the understanding that "everything that happens in my life is the best thing that could happen." If you believe that everything that happens is done, in the end, for your benefit, then there will be no place for stress in your life. If you are sure from the very beginning that everything will end well for you, you will no longer feel like a fragile boat in the endless ocean.

Here is an important principle for your personal philosophy: my current situation is exactly what I need at the moment for personal growth and development. In other words, every aspect of your life today is as it should be. Every difficulty you face contains opportunities that you can turn to your advantage.

Think about this: People only complain about things they can change. After all, it never occurs to anyone to complain about the law of gravity, even if, in accordance with it, we ended up on slippery asphalt. It's a paradox, but we complain not to those who can change something: to the boss - to the wife, but to the wife - to friends. Ask yourself: "Why and why do I always give my precious energy to everything that I do not need?".

Your mind scrolls through up to 60,000 thoughts daily. Analyze how many of them are dedicated to what you do not need? To get rid of these kinds of thoughts, ask yourself: “What do I need?” and reframe them into an intention to solve the problem and thus remove it from your mind.

When we start to "remodel" own life, it resembles repair work during the redevelopment of an apartment. Around - chaos, you have to make some decisions, deal with some people ... When the air is full of dust, everything is destroyed "in the trash", it is difficult to maintain a clear vision of the future and the ultimate goal. It is not surprising that under these conditions you may feel anxious and ask yourself: “Am I on the right track? Am I off course? Was it all worth it?" But chaos in nature testifies to growth, to the process that has begun, to dynamics and changes. Physicists know that a system that has gone through chaos reaches a new level of development.

Winemakers will tell you how they get the most exquisite wine. To do this, growing grapes are subjected to "stress", deliberately moistening the soil only at the limit of the vine's survival. After passing through this test, grapes give the best drink.

Millions of years ago, fear signaled to a person that he was out of his comfort zone, leading to a state of readiness to “run-fight-freeze”. Today, fear is a signal that you need to be careful. You need to recognize and accept your fear, and free yourself from it, ask yourself, what kind of image of the future scares you? Then replace this image with its positive opposite. After all, you created fear yourself, imagining some negative result in the future.

All the great teachers and sages said that you should never worry, tear your strength, spending it on the fight. The point is not to slow down the pace of your life, you just need to calm down. When faced with difficult choices, faced with important decisions, ask yourself, “How does this decision make me feel? How correct does it seem to me? What does my intuition tell me? Losers are afraid of failure, so they are failures.

The paradox is that the most successful are those people who fail the most, because they act the most! Thomas Watson Sr., the founder of IBM, once told a journalist: “If you want to succeed quickly, you must fail twice as often. Success lies on the other side of them." Successful people always have a positive attitude towards problems, they have a type of thinking that is called "solution orientation". They think about solutions most of the time. Losers, on the other hand, think about problems and difficulties all the time. Solution-oriented, successful people are constantly looking for a way out of the crisis, a way to overcome or bypass the obstacle on the way. Problem-oriented people are constantly talking about difficulties, who or what is causing it, how unhappy they are, and how hard life is for them.

In contrast, decision-oriented individuals ask the question, “What can be done?” - and begin to remove the obstacle.

The development of a person is very simple, and goes through three stages: - lived experience, - learning a lesson from experience, - development, thanks to this lesson. As soon as we learn these lessons, stop blaming others, and take full responsibility for our lives, our attitude towards ourselves changes, we begin to vibrate in the world in a different way and attract other states into your life. Failure should be treated as an experience, learn from it, become wiser, correct course and move on. See failure as a result that can be improved, as the seeds of something better. After all, lemonade can be made from the most sour lemon! One of the rules of success is: it doesn't matter where you come from, it only matters where you go.

There is a concept in physics known as the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle. talking plain language, it lies in the fact that when you look at something from a different angle, this something begins to change, as if adjusting to the observer.

In other words, observing something, you will definitely change it (I will note in passing - here is the reason for what we call the “evil eye”), i.e. even just by observing this world, we change it, and a change in it occurs only when the observer himself changes, and not the observed.

What is true of subatomic particles is also true of our lives. When you learn to look at things from a different angle, they will begin to change. Look at an event that seems to be unsuccessful from a different point of view, and you will definitely discover its positive aspects.

Michael Jordan has the most goals in the basket, but he also has the first place in misses. Disney has been bankrupt 7 times, while winning an Oscar 32 times. Napoleon Hill, whose books made thousands of millionaires, was bankrupt most of his life.

Remember that a true expert is someone who has failed enough to succeed. Treat past failures with a sense of gratitude! Throw your fear in the trash when making a decision, do not ask him for advice. His job is to keep you in your comfort zone. Make it a rule for yourself: “Do first of all what you are most afraid of!”. If fear looms ahead, come closer to it, examine it carefully, pat it on the head, thank it, and it will disappear.

Stop worrying about and for no reason. Remember, "Worry is praying for what you don't want." Worry is a negative form of goal setting. The book of Job says: “For the terrible thing that I was terrified of, this also overtook me; and what I feared came to me.”

Don't be afraid to make mistakes for your future. “In prayer, ask not for a light burden, but for strong shoulders” (St. Augustine). published

It is important to understand that men do not realize that they are doing this.

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Your partner will never say, after hearing your good advice: ʼʼHoney, how did I not think of that beforeʼʼ. He'll decide, "Well, I'll wait until Tuesday and then I'll pass off this thought as mine," and if you ask him, he'll swear he doesn't remember what you said about it before Tuesday. The best advice I can give you here is to discuss this matter with your man, let him read these pages and see what happens. After all, it's not the most relationship-damaging habit - it's just really annoying!

4. Why is my partner not able to express his tenderness and admiration to me the way I express to him?

Here's a situation for you: you and your partner decided to spend the evening together - dinner and dancing. You spend an hour and a half working on your hair, manicure, makeup, putting on a beautiful new dress. You enter the living room to greet your man and say:

And here I am, dear. Well, how do I look?

Your partner looks at you for a second and says:

You look good.

Then he goes to get the car keys.

You are left standing in the middle of the room with a terrible feeling of disappointment. ʼʼOkay, you think to yourself. - And what is all he can say?ʼʼ When your man returns, you tell him that you are a little offended by ᴇᴦο inattention.

But I told you that you look good, - he replies with surprise. What else do you want to hear from me?

Well, didn't you notice my new dress, or didn't you pay attention to my hairstyle and everything else?

Do you know what your problem is? your partner says, raising his voice. - You are never satisfied with anything - no matter what I do, everything is bad for you.

And you, being involved in a quarrel, cannot understand what the matter is.

And here's why it happens: unlike women, men do not notice details. Let's go back to the first chapter where we talked about male genetic memory. The men were taught to pay attention to the big picture, and the women to the details: the men looked out for enemy tribes on the horizon while the women watched the fire and the children; men thought about how many acres of land they could cultivate in a day and how to sow it on next year, while the women thought about what to cook for dinner today; the men were worried about having enough money to send their kids to college and pay the rent, while the women were worried about whether the kids had clean linen to go to school tomorrow. This does not mean that some of the levels of these worries are better, and some are worse - it's just different ways of perceiving the world around us that men and women are used to.

Yes, you know everything yourself.

How many times, discussing the furniture that you saw with your friends, did you hear your husband's question: ʼʼWhat, was the sofa blue? And I didn't notice.

Did you ask your partner: ʼʼDo you know my green dress with a white collar - do you think it will look better at your cousin's wedding than a black velvet suit?ʼʼ - and he looked at you helplessly until you finally began to understand that he doesn't remember the dresses you're talking about at all.

Most, but certainly not all men, do not pay as much attention to color, shape, quality and other details as women, who are used to noticing everything.

The problem is that women subconsciously expect the same perception from men.

Therefore, when you ask your partner: ʼʼHow do I look?ʼʼ - you expect from him the same answer that you yourself would give if he asked you about it - details, details, details. You know how your girlfriend reacts when she sees you in a new dress: ʼʼOh, Barbara, what's new? I really like. Turn around, let me look behind you. You know, this style really suits your figure. And how well you picked everything up - it looks just wonderfulʼʼ.

This does not mean that men do not want to express their feelings to you or praise you - they just do not pay attention to it, they are not used to delving into these issues. Moreover, most men do not even suspect that there is some kind of problem here until you explain it to them.

Solution:

It is important to understand that men do not realize that they are doing this. - concept and types. Classification and features of the category "It is important to understand that men do not realize that they act in this way." 2017-2018.