So, one of the spiritual leaders of mankind - the Dalai Lama - during a speech to students in the United States, at the University of Portland, without a shadow of a smile, said that very soon we would meet with aliens, and urged everyone to be mentally prepared for this. The fact is that the appearance of aliens can shock earthlings. However, this meeting will change the life of our planet from all points of view.

“Basically, they are just like us. Aliens feel things in the same way as we do, even if they differ in appearance, ”says the Dalai Lama.

The Dalai Lama / Shutterstock

Around the same time, former Canadian Defense Minister Paul Hellier said in a television interview that he knew for sure that aliens exist. The 90-year-old politician said that in 1961 a flotilla of 50 flying saucers arrived on Earth, which was recorded by the armed forces of several European countries, Russia and Canada. It turned out that now on our planet there are representatives of about 80 different extraterrestrial civilizations. Meetings of people with them occur every 3-4 weeks. Some are taken to their ships, some are taken to other planets. For what purpose is unknown.

When asked what these creatures look like, Hellier said that some of them are like small gray dolls with huge heads, others are tall and fair-skinned, similar to people. There are those who look exactly like us to get lost in the crowd of people. For example, they often dress up as nuns and go shopping in America...

Paul Hellier / Shutterstock

Humanoids generally have close ties with the States. According to the Canadian politician, several aliens work for the US government and share innovative technologies with them.

The rest are just watching the development of our society, fearing that people will explode a nuclear bomb, thereby upsetting the balance in the universe.

Hellier also has a shocking version that the Almighty is also a more developed being of another civilization. Like, the star of Bethlehem, which showed the magi the way to the newborn Jesus, was nothing more than a “flying saucer” of God.

Edward Snowden / Shutterstock

The latest evidence of the existence of aliens was the materials of the fugitive CIA agent Edward Snowden, who made public some of the secret US documents. There, among other things, contains information that between the government of the United States and the "high white" aliens there really is a cooperation agreement. And during World War II, these same humanoids helped Hitler develop advanced military technologies, such as building fast submarines in 1940 ... Snowden also said that the aliens created a kind of secret regime and rule the US and the whole world at the same time.

Adolf Hitler / Shutterstock

At the same time, the Whatdoesitmean website also supports the conspiracy theory and publishes materials that some world leaders have ordered their armies to wipe out entire countries from the face of the earth, as well as secret underground nuclear explosions.

Trailer of the film "Edge of Tomorrow"

A NASA research probe returns to Earth, whose mission was to search for extraterrestrial life in the remote corners of the solar system. The probe makes an emergency landing in Mexico, and strange creatures get out of it to the surface. They destroy everyone who gets in their way. Among other things, a virus was hidden in the probe, which, after a hard landing, ends up in the atmosphere of our planet.

Trailer of the movie "Monsters"

An unidentified cosmic body is rapidly approaching the Earth, which turns out to be a spaceship that looks like a shining sphere. The ship lands in New York's Central Park. To inform people about the coming End of the World, a representative of the alien civilization Klaatu was sent to Earth. According to the aliens, people are waging too many wars, which over time can lead to the death of the Earth. Since there are few potentially habitable planets in space, the Klaatu give people time to reform. If they fail to do so, humanity will be destroyed.

Shot from the film "The Day the Earth Stood Still"

The events of this picture of the director begin on July 2, 1996, when a giant spaceship flies up to our planet. With the help of smaller ships, aliens launch an attack on the largest cities in the world: Moscow, New York, Washington, Berlin, Rome and others. Absolutely everything burns in a hot plasma - people, buildings and equipment. Attempts to destroy the aliens turn out to be a failure - alien ships are invulnerable to earthly weapons. Now several brave Americans will have to save the planet at once, led by the president himself.

Trailer of the film "Independence Day"

One fine and warm evening New York is shaken by a series of explosions, the lights go out in the city. When a cheerful company, celebrating the promotion of a friend, runs out on the roof of the house in a panic, it becomes clear that a strange-looking creature has attacked the Earth. Panic reigns around, the army can do nothing to oppose this monster - there is only one thing left: to flee. In this turmoil, the main character - Rob - decides to go after a girl in trouble. The director of the picture was, and the producer -. The film was shot in the genre of "found footage" in the first person.

Trailer of the movie "Monstro"

Aliens are landing on Earth from Mars. They are going to destroy humanity, as well as their entire heritage. The largest cities in the US are destroyed by powerful explosions, and the number of small and vicious green creatures is increasing every hour. The President of the United States orders urgent measures to restore order, but the military, subordinate to the head of state, have their own opinion about what is happening. One of the responsible generals thinks that the aliens should be sent to Mars, and the second one thinks that it is better to establish friendly relations with them.

Trailer for Mars Attacks!

The picture is based on the board game of the same name. The NASA research station sends signals into space - scientists are sure that intelligent life forms are possible on the exoplanet closest to Earth. This signal is intercepted by five alien ships, which then head towards our planet. Four of them land in the Pacific Ocean, where international naval exercises are taking place at the time. To calmly dig in, the aliens cover the Hawaiian Islands, as well as the sea surrounding them, with an extended impenetrable dome. The task of the aliens is to send a signal to their brothers that the Earth is ready for colonization, as well as to suppress the possible resistance of the locals.

Trailer of the film "Battleship"

The film is based on the novel of the same name. Ray Ferrier works at the New York docks. He has two children, but he separated from his wife. Now, according to a court decision, he can only see them on weekends. On one of the usual weekends, aliens attack the Earth, who have been watching the life of mankind for many years, gaining an opportune moment for a deadly attack. Frightening giant machines sow death around - people simply evaporate after being hit by a beam that looks like lightning. Ray, who was trapped with the children, must find a way to survive this doomsday.

Trailer of the film "War of the Worlds"

Thousands of aliens live secretly from ordinary people on Earth. After the first contact, which took place in the middle of the 20th century, a secret organization was created on the planet, calling itself the "Men in Black" - the Bureau for Cooperation with Aliens. Thanks to guests from other planets, the bureau has various gadgets that allow you to interact with aliens, as well as help hide their existence from humanity. A veteran of the organization - agent Kay - is looking for a new partner, whom he offers to become a local police officer, James Edwards, who managed to catch up with an alien.

Trailer of the film "Men in Black"

The first part of the movie series. The film is based on the animated series of the same name, as well as toys created by Hasbro. The film tells about the war between the Autobots and the Decepticons - aliens from the planet Cybertron, who by chance ended up on Earth. Their mission is to find the so-called Great Spark, which is the source of life for giant robots. The Autobots learn that the leader of the Decepticons - Megatron - was the first to discover a trace of a powerful artifact, but could not get out of the planet. A detachment of Autobots is sent to Earth to stop their enemies - there people come to their aid.

Trailer of the movie "Transformers"

The film is set in 2135. To this point, humanity has survived two invasions of an alien race, nicknamed "buggers" because of their resemblance to insects. Now we are preparing for a new attack, which will happen sooner or later. New pilots capable of withstanding a deadly threat are sought after among children, since their minds are not burdened by anything extraneous. On Earth, in a special military school, Ender Wiggin is studying, who is destined to become the last hope of mankind for salvation.

Trailer for Ender's Game

Alan Schaeffer's commando squad, whose role he played, is sent to the jungles of Central America to rescue a high-ranking official and his colleagues from the captivity of the rebels. There, the military professional encounters a mysterious hunter who, for his own pleasure, kills people one by one. Gradually, the squad realizes that this creature is of unearthly origin and that in order to confront it, it will have to turn from technological innovations, resorting to primitive tricks.

Trailer of the film "Predator"

In April 2011, objects that are mistaken for meteorites fall on our planet. Later it becomes clear that these are not space stones, but alien ships. An alien race launches a massive offensive, intending to completely destroy humanity. The picture tells about the confrontation with the invaders of the Marines, who are trying to keep Los Angeles from the aliens.

Trailer for Alien Invasion: Battle for Los Angeles

Near future. Our planet survived the invasion of aliens, who destroyed the moon before attacking humanity. This, in turn, was the cause of various natural disasters on Earth. The invasion was repulsed with the help of nuclear weapons, the result of which was the destruction of almost all cities. Life on the planet has become impossible. Earthlings moved to the space station "Tet", and then to the satellite of the planet Saturn - Titan. Stations specially created by mankind remained on Earth, using sea water to produce thermonuclear energy. The stations are guarded by combat drones. For their service, an observation post was built on the planet, whose employees were former marine Jack Harper and signalman Victoria.

Trailer of the film "Oblivion"

Aliens are again attacking the Earth, but this time they appeared before humanity in the form of heroes of classic computer games of the past. The US government is gathering a squad of former gamers. To stand at the head of this unusual team is the USS President himself, with whom the dwarf, paranoid and eternal loser will confront the invaders.

Trailer of the movie "Pixels"

By mysterious ways, a file fell into our hands, which, with great difficulty, we managed to decipher. This entry is a unique opportunity to visit the Academy of Star Conquistadors, located somewhere in the outskirts of the Aquarius constellation (from the black hole to the left, fly three parsecs, ask Mymrik on the planetoid near the yellow dwarf - you can enroll with him for only half a thousand galactic credits) . The data is incomplete and fragmentary, but at times quite instructive.

So, cadets, we will devote today's lesson to the planet, which the natives arrogantly and without fiction call "Earth". Why representatives of highly developed civilizations are constantly trying to capture the Earth is not immediately clear. This planet is far from busy space routes, it is not of strategic interest, its oxygen atmosphere is detrimental to truly intelligent beings, the level of development of the natives is pitiful, and the resources useful for super-civilizations are ridiculous. Nevertheless, every self-respecting space conqueror is trying to capture it. What for? But like a sports trophy. After all, so many conquistadors broke off thorns and claws on this planet, and if you coped with it, then any task is up to you!

Today we will talk about the most unsuccessful conquests and list the rules that any star conquistador must learn. No wonder you spend your galactic credits on training!

Rule 1
Prevention is not a crime!

The conquerors under the conditional name "Martians" tried to capture the Earth around 1900 according to the local calendar. They looked like tentacled cephalopods capable of surviving in an oxygen atmosphere, which, at first glance, was an advantage in capturing. Unfortunately, not a single individual has survived, so one can only guess about the nature of these creatures. There are suspicions that it was the landing of the offspring of Cthulhu, who set up a temporary base on the planet Mars.

Having landed in the earthly country of England, the Martians quickly and almost without loss captured it, after which they prepared to conquer the rest of the planet. However, all of a sudden they died as one. And rightly so! After all, science has long proved (do not believe it - buy my textbook, only fifty credits): oxygen is the most harmful environment for a high mind! So the intelligence of the Martians cannot be considered high. How else to explain that they were killed by miserable terrestrial microorganisms? If there are problems with the immune system, you need to be vaccinated - even a mollusk can absorb it!

Lesson for the conquistador

Going to capture other people's worlds, one should not forget about personal hygiene and the need to clean the membrane membranes eight times a day. And getting vaccinated is vital!

Yes, it's painful and annoying. Not every intelligent individual is able to endure vaccination against thousands of terrestrial strains. But it is better to die painfully from injections next to the native masonry than to glue the tentacles from a miserable microbe one step away from conquering the Earth. Honor is dearer than life!

Information sources

◆H.G. Wells' novel "The War of the Worlds"
◆Lazar Lagin's story "Major Well Andrew"
◆Christopher Priest's novel The Space Machine

Rule 2
The miser pays tenfold!

In 1996, a powerful and predatory race attacked the Earth. The gigantic alien mothership unleashed smaller, but also huge ships that destroyed more than a dozen of the planet's main cities with the help of plasma strikes. The Earth army could not resist the invaders, whose invulnerability was provided by the force field. Even the most powerful weapon of earthlings - missiles with nuclear charges - turned out to be powerless against him.

But everything was spoiled by the command of strangers. Either these idiots were trying to save money, or the thieving admirals decided to cut some money on the conquest - but instead of buying a perfect operating system to control the technological stuffing of the squadron, these fools or thieves bought "left" software for cheap. As the investigation later revealed, clever businessmen handed the conquerors software based on the earth's Windows operating system (and even an outdated version).

It is no wonder that the earthlings managed to hack into the system and introduce a computer virus into it, which turned off the protective field of the squadron ships, after which the defeat of the fleet was a foregone conclusion. Of course, the perpetrators who survived the rout, not to mention their broods, were publicly annihilated, but is this a consolation?

Lesson for the conquistador

If we are talking about a full-fledged invasion, do not steal from yourself, and even more so do not save! Especially on such important things as technology. And in no case do not use "pirated" software! Remember, a free hawuk is only found in a wurr trap!

Information sources

◆Roland Emmerich's Independence Day (1996)

Rule 3
Dementia and courage - the conquistador is not good!

In 1942, lizard-like aliens, calling themselves Race, attacked the Earth in order to colonize it. At this time, the natives were doing their favorite thing - they fought in the "wall to wall" style. But because of the attack of strangers, people temporarily reconciled with each other, began to fight for their world and won.

The reasons for the failure are in poor intelligence and the arrogance of the Race. At first glance, the colonialists acted almost according to the textbook (the price is some hundred credits, don't forget to buy it!), having carried out preliminary reconnaissance. But the General Staff of the lizards did not take into account that several centuries had passed between the collection of information and the beginning of the invasion on Earth. All data is hopelessly outdated - according to them, the natives were at the level of the Middle Ages. Therefore, the presence of aircraft, armored vehicles and firearms among earthlings turned out to be an unpleasant surprise for the Race. And instead of conducting a second reconnaissance, Rasa, showing fatal dementia, rushed to the attack.

The arrogance of the conquerors is also evidenced by the low level of their equipment, which was not much superior to that of the earth. Nuclear weapons and jet aircraft did not provide the invaders with decisive superiority. The situation could be corrected by the ability to fight, but it turned out to be higher for constantly warring earthlings. The result is a mediocre defeat of the conquerors, which threatened the existence of their species.

Lesson for the conquistador

If you decide to attack, ensure a total advantage in advance. To do this, you need to have up-to-date information. Learn, learn and learn! And do not spare money for rearmament. And if there are problems with this, it’s better not to get out of the egg at all!

Information sources

◆Harry Turtledove's cycle of novels "World War"

Rule 4
Don't put all your eggs in one nest!

Insectoid aliens, dubbed "buggers" by the earthlings, descended on this primitive planet and almost won. In the so-called solar system (wretched yellow dwarf, pah!) the terrestrial squadrons suffered defeat after defeat. The insectoids were already looking forward to triumph, but their armada was unexpectedly defeated by a tiny reserve fleet of earthmen. After that, using the captured technology of the aliens, the humans staged a total xenocide for the buggers.

The reason for the defeat lies in the hive-type social structure, when the destruction of the Queen leads to the paralysis of the entire horde. One random rocket changed the course of history. Having lost their leader, the buggers lost the will to live, folded their paws and dutifully went to their foremothers...

For the same reason, the Mimic race also lost the battle for Earth. They made up a single neural network, and the role of the "control center" was played by an individual codenamed Omega. True, her rookery was far from the battlefield, but people managed to track down and destroy the main mimic.

Lesson for the conquistador

Don't get hung up on the person of the commander! The disappearance of even the greatest individual should not mean the defeat of her fellow tribesmen. Mantra “The people is the Leader, the Leader is the people. Without the Leader there will be no people” is cowardly, unreasonable and vicious. Ensure continuity of command, then there will be a chance to win.

Information sources

◆Orson Scott Card's novel "Ender's Game"
◆ranobe Hiroshi Sakurazaki "Edge of Tomorrow"

Rule 5
The right choice is half the success!

In addition to open attack, there are other ways to capture the planet. Some races, due to their biological characteristics, are forced to operate in secret. A number of similar species have attempted to conquer the Earth through infiltration.

In 1953, in the American town of Santa Mira, reasonable disputes tried to copy all the locals. Copies of earthlings were grown in pods, and the aliens turned the originals into dust. True, duplicates existed for only five years and could not reproduce. Therefore, replacing the natives and conquering the planet, disputes depleted its resources and moved on. The aliens had a collective mind, which helped them coordinate actions and learn from mistakes. But this was also the weakness of the invaders - the individuality of the earthlings was incomprehensible to them. Because mistakes were inevitable, and people sensed something was wrong.

In 1957, children were born in the English village of Midwich who were actually aliens in disguise. A few months earlier, Midwich had been covered with a dome, inside which the inhabitants fell into a coma. Later it turned out that all local females are ready to lay eggs (well, or whatever these wild earthlings practice for the appearance of offspring). Several dozen cubs were no different from the natives, except for the color of their eyes. But over time, people realized that alien foundlings have telepathy and the power of suggestion.

And also cuckoos (as the natives called them by analogy with some kind of earthly monster - don’t ask what it looks like, I don’t know and don’t want to know!) matured twice as fast as earthlings. In addition to Midwich, similar cases occurred in four more regions of the planet, where people dealt with the aliens when they were still weak. However, the Midwich foundlings also ended badly ...

If you are going to secretly take over this planet, you need to move into those who have access to power

In 1969, in the Soviet town of Tugarino, the conquerors began to plant their consciousnesses in the bodies of natives. The capture was successful, but it turned out that the youngest earthlings cannot become a receptacle for high intelligence (did I already say that this is a defective planet?). The plan was thwarted as the Earthlings alerted the authorities, who sealed off the city. The conquistadors had to get out...

Lesson for the conquistador

In all the cases described, the covert invasion failed. The reason is the wrong selection of the object of infiltration. Small town dwellers? Seriously? It's time for the invaders to learn: earthly inhabitants mean nothing. If you are going to secretly take over this planet, you need to move into those who have access to money, power and the media. If you control the source, which the earthlings call "zomboyaschik", you can convince people of anything. Even if aliens don't exist.

Information sources

◆Jack Finney's novel The Flesh Snatchers (Invasion of the Body Snatchers)
◆John Wyndham's novel The Cuckoos of Midwich
◆Alexander Mirer's story "Main Noon"

Rule 6
The patience and labor of the native will grind!

Even a carefully planned covert invasion can fail at the last moment because of mere trifles. So, one day, aliens capable of absolute bodily transformations took advantage of the greed of mankind, having redeemed almost the entire Earth. The plan was brilliantly worked out, the spherical aliens used their own laws and traditions against people. And the earthlings voluntarily sold their house for conventional units called "dollars" (compared to galactic loans, this is rubbish!). But the conquerors lost their vigilance, because due to an absurd accident, their plan became known to a local journalist (a cheap analogue of our venerable liars). And this pitiful fellow managed to find the weak point of the intruders!

Another time, aliens from the constellation of the Wolf infiltrated the upper echelons of earthly society under the guise of politicians, scientists and businessmen. In order to make the Earth suitable for themselves and destroy humanity, the invaders built factories that, with their emissions, accelerated the greenhouse effect. Through bribing powerful people and deceiving others, the plan came close to success. But due to the loss of vigilance, a curious radio astronomer accidentally penetrated the secret, who prevented the invaders.

Finally, the race of werewolf-reptile Skrulls was able to replace many of the superheroes of the "Marvel universe" - a completely anti-scientific dimension of the Earth. However, the ridiculous death of the mercenary Elektra, who lost her human appearance after death, attracted the attention of the local authority Tony Stark, also known as Iron Man. Under his leadership, the surviving superheroes managed to defeat the "secret invasion". In all cases, before the victory of the space conquistadors, the smallest thing was missing, literally the tip of the spider's tail!

Lesson for the conquistador

Remember: you need to be patient and attentive. Careful preparation of the invasion will go to the vigorous jellyfish in the drawbar, if you lose concentration even for a moment. No indulgence for yourself and your comrades-in-arms! Successful conquest is accounting and control!

Information sources

◆Clifford Simak's novel "Almost Like Humans"
◆David Twoy's film "Arrival" (1996)
◆Brian Michael Bendis comic "Secret Invasion"

Rule 7
A hungry belly is deaf to reason!

Earth hedgehog-like critter monsters are known throughout the galaxy as unrivaled devourers. These ravenous creatures can rapidly grow in size due to their gluttony, after which they are able to control complex mechanisms, including firearms and starships. In addition, critters are capable of collective action.

But the main instinct of these creatures is hunger. To eat means to live, that's their motto! Because critters are extremely vulnerable to organized resistance. Moreover, the race of Space Hunters helped people in the destruction of these predators...

Lesson for the conquistador

Food and other pleasures are important to the conquistador. After all, grabbing as much as possible is the point of an invasion! But in order to succeed, one must keep the instincts under tight control. If you give free rein to your passions, you become vulnerable. A sensible diet is the way of the conquistador!

Information sources

Rule 8
Don't play with food!

Aliens, whom people called Others, brought down several waves of conquest on the planet. They caused controlled earthquakes, tsunamis, a total epidemic of a deadly disease, deprived people of the opportunity to use their equipment. In four stages, the Others got rid of most of the natives and ... for some reason, they set about the incomprehensible fifth stage. They began to hunt the remains of humans by hand! The super-civilization, having almost reached its goal, played with the remnants of humanity, jeopardizing its achievements. Boredom?

In another reality, the so-called Souls, devoid of a physical shell, penetrated into the bodies of people, displacing their minds. Outwardly, there were no changes with the person, but his consciousness was suppressed by the intruder. And so the experienced Soul-Wanderer, having got into the body of a young earthly girl, unexpectedly encountered resistance. And instead of eliminating the recalcitrant, the Wanderer tried to coexist with the carrier, crossing out the interests of her race, which eventually led the invasion of Souls to defeat ...

In both cases, the near-complete conquest of the planet failed due to the foolish whims and ridiculous kindness of the invaders.

Lesson for the conquistador

Earthlings are just prey for any sane invader. Because no games, no concessions! There is a person - there is a problem, no person - no problem! And whoever thinks otherwise, sign up not for the conquistadors, but for the Peacekeepers Corps. There is nothing for you to do in our Academy! However, tuition loans will not be returned, and do not dream.

Information sources

◆Rick Yancy's novel The Fifth Wave
◆Stephanie Meyer's novel The Guest

Rule 9
Don't pull the voorr's tail!

The race, which the earthlings called the Visitors, visited the planet, offering friendship to the natives - advanced technologies in return for the chemical waste that was allegedly necessary for their world. The earthlings happily agreed, not noticing that the aliens were gradually taking control of their society. The media, at the suggestion of aliens, began to persecute scientists trying to analyze the actions of strangers.

Although the Visitors looked human, they were actually carnivorous reptiles. The true purpose of their arrival on Earth was to conquer the planet, steal the earth's water and use people as food or slave warriors. The Earthlings, having learned the truth, made contact with dissidents among the Visitors who wanted real cooperation, and managed to prevent the conquest.

That's what happens when the invasion drags on! Although the Visitors managed to ingratiate themselves with the earthlings by cunning, the invaders rested on their laurels for too long.

Lesson for the conquistador

Humanity is mired in lies and mutual distrust - they are saturated with the entire centuries-old history of this race. Even if people are gullible at first, it quickly passes. Their recent idol could easily become a target. So don't put off conquest in the cheek pouch! As soon as people have lost their vigilance, immediately attack. Remember: a good earthling is a dead earthling!

Information sources

◆The Visitors franchise (1983 miniseries, 1984 series, 2009–2011 series)

Rule 10
A good end - conquest is not the crown!

Even if you managed to conquer the Earth, it is not certain that you will be able to keep it if you make mistakes. The hozalich empire took over the planet with little to no bloodshed. Under the rule of the conquerors, mankind flourished for several centuries - the Khozalikhs taught the savages the Highest Etiquette, saved them from disease and hunger, opened the way to the stars ... And what was the result? Bloody war for independence!

The race of psykle giants was more cruel to people. 99% of the population was destroyed, only a handful of the feral remained. But after a thousand Earth years, the invaders decided to train the natives to work on mining machines. And, having opened the way to technology for people, they took a step towards the destruction of the Psyklo empire.

Tripod aliens who conquered the Earth controlled the planet for more than a hundred years. Most of the people died, the rest were turned into slaves and servants. The obedience of earthlings was ensured by mental control through special devices on the head. However, only 5% of earthlings did not succumb to this. And a miserable bunch of renegades still managed to organize a successful rebellion against their masters!

Lesson for the conquistador

Earthlings are cunning and vile creatures who are alien to gratitude. And after the successful conquest of the Earth, the conquistadors should not relax their sphincters. Even if you have kept some of the countrymen alive, they need an eye for an eye for an eye. All the eyes you have! Otherwise, your successes can easily be covered with an octarine tub.

Information sources

◆Drake Meistral by Walter Jon Williams
◆L. Ron Hubbard's novel "Battlefield Earth"
◆John Christopher's "Tripods" cycle

* * *

Our lesson has come to an end. I hope now you have hacked on the tentacles: the inhabitants of the Earth are so inconsistent and principled, obstinate and controlled, shy and courageous ... Contradictory. Strange. So, before you decide to conquer this terrible planet, think: do you need it?

For homework, prepare an essay on the topic "Why it is best to leave the Earth alone." And those slippery bastards who fail to complete this simple task will be fined fifty credits or lose one pseudopodia. All right, get lost!

However, when you read science fiction books and watch movies, aliens usually try to conquer us with brute military force. It is assumed that their technology and weapons are cooler and we kind of fight back. Sometimes successful, sometimes not.

But imagine that there could be more than just violent or military scenarios...

1. Military trade

Aliens secretly establish contact with the government of one of the earthly states. They offer him a weapon that provides superiority over any existing on Earth, but, of course, inferior to their own. For a fee with valuable resources, or in the variant of a military alliance - they say, we are waging a war in space here and we need a strong single highly developed planet as an ally, and not the mess that you have. Stick with us, you will eat meat. It is advisable to choose weapons for delivery that do not pollute the planet.

As soon as the beneficent go to war with other states, high-tech weapons are also offered to the enemy. It is possible on behalf of another alien race: they say, we do not want the Earth to be for our enemies, beat the traitors and be free. Or for a fee, nothing personal, only business. As the conflict develops, the parties are supplied with more and more cool prodigies at a higher price, and so on until complete mutual extermination.

2. Economic.

The aliens, having arrived, establish friendly relations with earthlings and offer mutually beneficial trade. If their civilization is capable of moving among the stars, then they are ahead of us by at least several technological structures and dozens of generations of technology. They offer us high-tech consumer goods that overtake the level of development of earthly science and technology by some 30 years. That is, they do not give earthlings technological superiority.

If suddenly we manage to reproduce production technologies, generation + products are thrown onto the market. They take it inexpensively - as much as the earthly "analogues" cost, so that one cannot accuse them of dumping. They accept our money as payment, which they invest in the purchase of land and deposits of raw materials. Correctly pay all taxes and duties. In addition, they offer transport services - from space tourism for the rich to cheap cargo transportation within the Earth, as well as delivery from other planets of raw materials scarce on earth.

Part of the production to ensure the loyalty of local governments can even be located on Earth, they employ local workers who perform the simplest operations, even those that could be performed automatically. Earthlings are happy, there are no reasonable reasons for refusal - if some state starts to act, an embargo is announced to it.

After several decades of such cooperation, not only does the main part of the earth's industry die - it makes no sense to invest in it, both in light and heavy, since no one needs earthly machines or ships with trains, but earthlings lose the ability to produce even what they used to know how to do. . There is no point in studying to be an engineer or a scientist - there is still no job. At this stage, the aliens already have pocket governments and pocket armies, which begin to reduce excess eaters, up to minimizing the population of the Earth.

3. Scam

Aliens arrive, conduct cultural exchange for some time, rub in confidence, demonstrate a high level of science and technology, some of them are simply given, but without fanaticism, explaining restraint by the risks of unbalancing the development of civilization. They admire earthly culture, take the leaders of states and the cultural elite to visit them, show how well they live, admire the wisdom of earthly scientists and politicians, applaud the concerts of earthly musicians.

It is then reported that their science has discovered that the Sun will soon - in the span of a few years - explode. They express their readiness to gratuitously take to a safe planet and save a part of the Earth's population of our choice - even children, even great scientists with athletes, even the unfortunate with Down's syndrome, and some of those whom they decide themselves.

In parallel, "representatives of the third force" secretly appear on Earth - supposedly a different race of aliens, or, not so disinterested fellow citizens of the first. They are ready to take out additionally those who can pay expensive tickets. Non-ferrous and radioactive metals and their deposits are accepted as payment - with their technologies they can be quickly mined.

Panic begins on Earth, a fight for resources for which you can buy a ticket, anarchy on the eve of the inevitable end. The elite, which could establish order, is not up to it, every man for himself. If someone rests and does not even lead to a free ticket, others eliminate him for the same ticket. A couple of years later, the Earth was thrown into barbarism, the elite was taken out and sold into slavery / for organs / for meat, nuclear warheads and planes were dismantled for scrap, the new owners dictate their terms to the rest.

4. Conspiracy

Aliens secretly take out some of the promising earthlings, show them their prosperous society and explain that those who were taken out are actually the descendants of representatives of their race who accidentally got stuck on Earth. There should be no problems convincingly depicting humanoids in stationary conditions for representatives of such a race, at least imagine humanoid robots to earthlings, at least use hypnosis with drugs. They let you live at home, taste the delights.

After that, the guests are announced that humanity is dangerous for peace in the Universe, and it needs to be destroyed, but the galactic UN does not order it to be done by the forces of an external invasion, it is necessary to persuade it to the right path of development. Treated as familiar with local specifics, they are thrown back to Earth, well prepared, with the task of infiltrating key positions and preparing the capture process. It's like a link, but with the ability to knock off the term of faithful service and get a satisfying ration for completing the task.

The intruders are supported financially and informationally, they are advised what to say, whom to rely on, etc. To simplify the seizure of power and the development of chaos, you can throw information to the rest of the population of the Earth that they have alien agents, and give some false signs to expose the agents, such as a certain chromosome set. As a result, after a few decades, the finances, governments and armies of the Earth are headed by people convinced that they are representatives of a different race, the invasion of which they contribute in every possible way in their posts, agreeing to any unequal treaties and blocking resistance.

5. Theologically sadistic

Aliens arrive and hang their ships in the distant orbits of the Earth, where they are practically inaccessible to earthly weapons. They do not make contact, perhaps even remain invisible to us. Sometimes, quite spontaneously, they make pinpoint strikes, the logic of which is impossible to understand.

Then they will take and destroy some large city. Then they will drop a virus that rooting out a certain plant or animal species, but not touching others. That will incinerate the temples of one particular religion. Then they will start methodically shooting planes and ships in a certain region of the Earth. Destroy all meteorological satellites. They will burn out a piece of deaf taiga, etc.

Not only will the global economic system not withstand such unpredictable risks, since the volatility in the markets is already tens of percent daily, and insurance premiums have skyrocketed, but the earthlings are also psychologically broken. A sword that constantly hangs overhead, the blows of which cannot be predicted, provokes mass psychoses, the emergence of totalitarian sects, group suicides and pogroms.

When the aliens finally decide to make contact, the society that has fallen into anarchy will willingly obey them, happily accepting the version that the gods have descended to it. The will to resist will be broken, humanity will fulfill any, even the most idiotic demands. The earth will be conquered without great destruction and casualties, but with a huge amount of lulz for the invaders.

sources

Ufologists, constantly observing outer space, calculated that a cluster of unknown objects is rapidly moving towards our planet.

Experts believe that this could be an armada of intergalactic alien ships. Moreover, the researchers are convinced that representatives of extraterrestrial civilization are very hostile, and the first mass contact between the “green men” and earthlings does not bode well for us.

What might the aliens need here? Our “blue ball” itself, its minerals, or maybe we ourselves or our technologies? The latter does not look very likely, since humanity has not yet flown further than the Moon (and that is very doubtful), however, intruders, presumably, have already traveled many millions of light years to enslave or destroy people. Naturally, we have been frightened many times before with predictions about the attack of “little green men” that did not come true, but this does not mean at all that the next prediction of ufologists cannot turn out to be true.

Experts say:

According to the data we received, the combat fleet of representatives of an extraterrestrial civilization will reach us by the end of the year. At the same time, something strange is happening with alien spaceships. The future invaders seem to have realized that they were spotted, and went on some kind of deceptive maneuver. Part of the armada turned around and flew back, while the other part moved towards us at increased speed. In less than three months, it will fly up to the Earth. We believe that first we will be attacked by a strike group, the main goal of which will be the destruction of the largest cities in the world. This will immediately plunge society into chaos. Then another flotilla will arrive on our planet, which will establish a new order here. However, there is a high probability that all of us will simply be destroyed.

Ufologists also report that the governments of America, Russia, China and other influential countries of the world are well aware of the upcoming invasion. At the moment they, they say, are thinking about how best to proceed in this situation. On the one hand, politicians can negotiate with aliens and try to minimize the consequences of alien interference in our lives. On the other hand, the powers that be can “sell” us to the invaders and go live in their luxurious bunkers under the ocean. Finally, a large-scale war is possible, which will unite all the countries of the Earth in the face of a common enemy.

Famous people about a possible attack

It is noteworthy that quite recently a similar statement was made by the famous English theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking. The authoritative scientist did not give the exact date of the invasion of the representatives of an alien civilization on Earth, however, he said that he had no doubts about the aggressiveness of the aliens and the defenselessness of earthlings before conquerors from other planets. People, according to Hawking, will not be able to defend themselves against a highly developed alien civilization that has mastered space flights over enormous distances. However, the physicist is “reassuring” that no invasion may take place if humanity destroys itself in advance with a nuclear war or creates a powerful artificial intelligence that itself wishes to wipe us off the face of the earth.

Former astronaut Ed Mitchell, who passed away last year, made a sensational statement before his death. He told reporters that he saw aliens with his own eyes. According to the American, outwardly the aliens were thin and small with disproportionately large heads. In addition, Mitchell said that the aliens are extremely aggressive towards us and consider human civilization to be defective, unworthy of existence. The stargazer also said that the US government has long known about the intentions of humanoids from other planets, but is in no hurry to do anything about this.

Finally, in April of this year, another sensational information came from the former head of the US national space agency. Charles Boldenn, who NASA shortly before suspended from work, said that the invasion will happen very soon, and our days are numbered. Ufologists around the world then considered that the former astronaut was removed from his high position after he declared his desire to tell the world community the truth about aliens. The words of this specialist, who had access to the most secret and important information about UFOs and aliens, are difficult to doubt.