How to completely change yourself in 12 months and become better than you are

At one fine moment in my life, I realized that something was missing in me: it seems that you live, but something is not right and wrong. I looked at myself from the outside and in the mirror, went through one strong training on my own, read a couple of developing books. I made disappointing conclusions that I have a bunch of bad habits, I hardly devote time to my health, I'm not popular with girls, my level of disorganization goes off scale, and besides, I often get away from solving complex life tasks.

It doesn't matter how many days are in your life, what matters is how much life is in your days!

Sport

It all starts with its implementation in your life. We start with basic exercises, but they must be performed every day. These are simple exercises: squats, on the press (raising the torso), push-ups. It all starts with a repetition of 5 times and every day increases by 1 time, you can perform two visits per day. In a month, you will squat 35 times, do ab exercises 35 times, and do push-ups 35 times. Then you can increase the number of repetitions as needed, but be sure to do it every day.

Each person needs to find his own sport, and you should not be led by fashion: everyone runs, which means running, everyone does yoga, which means yoga. Look for your sport that will suit you completely: loads, interest, time, financial component, people. It should be an extension of your essence.

I tried for a year, gym, boxing, running, jiu-jitsu, aikido, cycling. At the same time, he was engaged in several types for several months. It was a great time, because it was an absolute benefit for my health, and I also understood more and more what exactly I want from sports.

My choice fell on jiu-jitsu and swimming is the basis of my sports development. Now this is for life, because the pleasure that I get in the classroom is difficult to put into words, and my success in this field only reinforces this conviction.

Books

You will have to read a lot. An excellent result is 40–50 books per year. I have read 42 books and I understand that 50 books a year is realistic. The main thing is to read without stopping. And, of course, do not watch TV and do not stay too long on social networks.

Read only to develop your mind: psychology, Russian and foreign classics, self-development, finance - no tabloid or entertaining books.

Outline the essence of what you read, what impressed or disliked the book, memorize quotes. So you train your memory and you can always surprise your interlocutors with smart sayings from books.

Ayn Rand's book Atlas Shrugged greatly influenced me with its fundamental nature and strong dialogues, as well as situations similar to events from my life.

My morality, the morality of reason, is contained in one axiom: reality exists in one choice - to live. Everything else flows from here. To live, a person must consider three things as the highest and decisive values: Reason, Purpose, Self-Respect. Reason as the only tool of knowledge, Goal as the choice of happiness, which this tool should achieve, Self-respect as an indestructible confidence that he is able to think and his personality is worthy of happiness, which means worthy of life. These three values ​​require all the virtues of man, and all his virtues are connected with the relation of existence and consciousness: rationality, independence, purity, honesty, justice, efficiency, pride.

Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

Discipline

What distinguishes a strong personality from an ordinary person is this. Regardless of your mood, motivation, external circumstances, family relationships, do what is necessary at a given time.

Learn to swim against the current of life circumstances, educate yourself so that the internal state does not depend on what is happening around. It was very hard and not everything worked out right away, as there were breakdowns. But I went forward again and again with the support of loved ones and an inner desire to go this way at all costs.

Where can you start? From the morning ritual. Here is the simplest and most effective method for honing discipline: get up immediately at the wake of the alarm clock, wash your face, turn on the music, do exercises with strength exercises, then a contrast shower, a healthy breakfast (without fried and sweet) and reading a book (you can on the way to the office) .

So you need to do until you can do it automatically and without forcing yourself. It took me 3 months, sometimes, of course, there were failures, especially after overloaded days. I recommend to anyone who wants to change their lifestyle to develop their own morning ritual.

We must learn to control ourselves: our speech, gait, gaze and gestures. Wherever you are, at home, at work, in the gym, you should radiate confidence and act without too much fuss. Remember the principle of feedback: even if you don’t feel like that, this feeling of confidence and discipline will come.

A very useful exercise for developing inner strength - despite all your natural fears, do not look away from the interlocutor, from people passing by who look into your eyes. Frankly, martial arts helped me in this. But it is also good to look with a warm look, showing that you are benevolent.

To educate myself, I learned to deny myself pleasures: bars, alcohol, sweets, cigarettes, impulsive shopping, idleness, empty talk at work. This may not happen right away, but we need to think about it all the time, work in this direction. And one day I said to myself: “Yes, I haven’t had alcohol for three months and I haven’t eaten sweets for two months.”

I attended sports classes or courses despite my mood, circumstances, weather and my motivation. Set a schedule and stick to it, discard all your favorite excuses. I liked coming to the hall when something was stopping others and when there were like-minded people who were ready to support me in these endeavors.

And most importantly - you need to learn to control yourself when little is working out, and a mess is going on around. Be an island of calm and cold endurance.

Finance

Keep a financial journal. Lead it for a month, second, third and do not stop. And do not just keep it, but analyze every month what goes where, why and how to fix it.

I had big expenses for coffee - 1,300 rubles a month. I realized that it was time to reduce its amount, and now the level of spending on coffee is 600 rubles a month. Coffee is my weakness that I don't want to get rid of.

Many say that a magazine is a useless thing: "I already know how much I spend and earn." And you try to keep it for 1 year with accurate analysis and graphs and you will see the whole picture of your financial literacy or illiteracy.

Keep yourself in financial asceticism, stop buying what you don’t need or is imposed by advertising and acquaintances. Most of our purchases are useless and will not be useful in life, and it is quite easy to do without them.

Find additional income, even if it is small, but it will motivate you to achieve even greater achievements. Let it be an increased workload at work, additional work (of any format), freelancing, selling unnecessary things, teaching other people. The mistake of the majority - everyone wants a lot of money at the initial stages, but this does not happen. You do not immediately earn a lot at work, and in life everything is gradual.

Relations

This point is more about men who have not found their soul mate or even do not want to, which I was. If you are alone and have a lot of time, develop the skill of meeting girls. Register on dating sites, meet in cafes and on the street, chat in the gym, ask friends about girls you know.

Try different communication strategies: gentleman, macho, modest, sports guy. Meet girls smarter than you, admit it, conquer them.

In various situations, not everything will work out: wrong words, wrong method, not your person, failures in bed. But you do not stop, it should temper you.

And over time, you will learn to understand the opposite sex, learn how to easily start a conversation, make beautiful compliments. Girls will often reciprocate, they will feel an interesting personality in you. But do not be self-confident, look for the one who will appreciate your qualities "without cuts", and be faithful and faithful to her.

If it's simple - love, suffer, conquer, disperse and start anew. Become the one with whom you want to spend time, with whom you will be comfortable in any situation, be able to understand and listen to the other person. And remember that your significant other can always leave you, so enjoy every moment together.

Skills

Start developing skills you didn't have before, such as breaststroke, typing, contextual planning, emergency driving. Master them, find a mentor on the topic, get training. Such achievements develop the personality, make it multifaceted.

You will also learn how to deliberately step out of your comfort zone and overcome fear, which will later become your driving force. All great achievements begin with small victories over yourself.

In the past 12 months, I have been doing things I have never done before: heavy weight training, meditation, training with children, training, austerity.

Spirituality

Define your values ​​in life, create internal and social rules for yourself, find your "I".

Finally, find the answer to the eternal question: “Why am I here? What is my mission?

How? Ask yourself important questions, do not look at other people who are drifting like a boat in the ocean, become a guide for yourself and others. Read spiritual books, visit spiritual places and, finally, create your own picture of the world order. This is very important, so you will become steadfast and you will have your own faith. Not the one that is shown in the media, but its own inner one.

Most people are afraid to ask themselves difficult questions and close themselves with materialism, like I did in my time, but this is a dead end branch of development. Things and everyday fuss cannot be closed, they will not give you the happiness that you will feel when you find something important inside that will lead you further.

Good Habits

As you get rid of bad habits and change structurally, you will need other habits - and it is better that they are useful.

For example, if you talk a lot, learn to be silent and listen to the interlocutor, even when your tongue is itching - be silent.

If you eat a lot of sweets, replace it with nuts or dried fruits, do not eat so much chocolate and cookies, drinking sweet tea.

Books are a great rescue from TV and Internet addiction. It's just that the brain doesn't want to "thin" anymore.

If you have nothing planned and everything happens just like that, start a notebook, write down all your tasks for the day, week, month. Write down the thoughts that come to you, fresh ideas, describe events and people. Keep track and analyze your life.

If you smoke, quit and immediately hit a sport, preferably one where the lungs work the most to expel all the resins from yourself.

Algorithm for structural change in 12 months

• Sports load every day. Decide on your sport for a long time, do it, no matter what, for a whole year.
• Read a lot of books, 3-4 per month. Write down a summary of what you read.
• Develop discipline. Deny yourself pleasure. Stay calm when it's stormy. Try to deny yourself something every month.
• Develop financial literacy. Keep a financial journal and find extra income throughout the year.
• If you are single - look for your soul mate and develop the skill of seduction. If you are not alone, fall in love again with your chosen one.
• Learn new skills you didn't know before. Desirable - 1 skill in 2 months.
• Find an answer for what you are here for, even an approximate one - it will already be good. Spend as much time on this as you see fit.
• Get good habits instead of bad ones. This is everyday work.

Victory over yourself is the true success in life.

Change is difficult, but possible. The main thing is to want to set yourself interesting (and not so) goals and achieve them, no matter what. Everything will not work right away, there will be misfires, breakdowns, but the movement vector must be maintained, and you will definitely break through the barrier of your weakness.

If you think that this requires motivation or money, you are mistaken: you only need one pure desire to become better than you are, and time, which is already so small in our lives. But remember, there is no limit to perfection, this is a constant work on yourself, and it continues until the end of your days. A developed personality lives much happier than those who are weak in front of themselves and recede before life circumstances.